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- Questions about stooling and constipation.
- 5. When and How Do You Toilet Train? - Top
- Timing is the most important aspect of toilet training. As a parent, you have to first make the decision that your child is ready. Only when a child is prepared to take on this developmental milestone should you work with him to that end. There are several indicators that will key you in to readiness, which you will begin to see typically between the ages of 17 and 24 months:
-Your child is able to demonstrate some level of independent functioning- dressing and undressing, cleans up after himself, etc.
-Enjoys his achievements
-Can be motivated to work on tasks and shows initiative from time to time
-Has regular elimination cycles or periods
-Demonstrates and awareness of what a bowl movement is or what a wet diaper is
If these criteria applies to your child, then chances are, he is ready to be toilet-trained. The next thing to consider is whether there has recently been a stressful event that your child was exposed to or whether you anticipate on over the next few weeks (the period of time that you will be working with your child on toileting). Stressful events may interfere with your child’s ability to master this task. Events that young children experience as stressful include:
-the change of a caretaker
-moving, changes in living arrangements
-the birth of a sibling; a new family member living in the home
-fighting/ marked conflicts between parents
-changes in one parents work routines (e.g. dad is getting home much later and not being as available)
To the extent possible, wait until the stressful situation has subsided. Experts vary in the amount of time one should wait after a child has gone through a period of stress. The average time appears to be approximately 6 weeks. Again, your child will also let you know if he is ready to embark on this task or whether more time is needed.
Once you’ve determined that it is a good time for your child to begin his "classes", introduce the process gradually.
Start with "Mr. Poopy Pan": Start with a potty that he knows belongs to him and only him. Give the potty a playful name- "Mr. Poopy-Pan" or even "Mrs.potty" will do fine. Talk to your child about what Mrs.Potty is for and allow him or her to become comfortable with it. Perhaps you can engage in some play sessions where one of your child’s dolls/ characters uses Mrs. Potty to do "peepee".
Children learn through modeling: Once your child is familiar with his potty, take him and the potty into the bathroom with you when you use the toilet. You will be modeling the behaviors that you are attempting to teach your child. Explain to him that everyone (mommy, daddy, grandma, Etc.) uses the potty to do "peepee" and "poopoo" and that one day, he will learn to use his potty to do it too.
Progressive movements towards using his potty: Once your child is ok with being in the bathroom with his potty and you, see if he is willing to sit on his potty while you sit on yours. Engage him in an activity as this is happening- read him a book, play a finger game, Etc. Move progressively towards getting him to sit on the potty without his diaper. With each accomplishment, acknowledge it through your excitement and let him know how wonderful it is that he can do what he is demonstrating.
Motivate your child and make it fun: Some parents have been known to find success through the use of stickers geared towards motivating and encouraging the use of the potty. Others may use a game that the child can play whenever he sits on his potty. You may prefer a combination of both, or some other technique. What ways of motivating your child can you think of?
Pee and Poop come from me: Have your child walk around without a diaper for extended periods of time throughout the day. This will help him to learn where pee and poop come from. Whenever accidents occur (as they most surely will), you can offer, "oh, looks like we missed the potty this time, but maybe next time we can use it to put the pee-pee in." You can use these events to encourage him to use his potty to go and pee or poop.
Getting to the potty: Once he is comfortable sitting on his potty without his diaper, have him sit there while you ask him to pee or poop in the potty for you. If you’ve been keeping track of his elimination routines, you can have these times coincide with the times that he normally pees or makes b.m. Give positive feedback and help him to recognize what an accomplishment he has made when he does pee or poop in the potty.
With ongoing encouragement and sensitivity to your child’s pace, soon he will be able to go regularly and consistently. Work with him to take over more and more of the responsibility for going to the potty- from pulling his pants up or down to flushing the toilet. Once your child reaches the final stages of toilet training, he will still need approximately two months to practice his new skill. During this time, parents are encouraged to use training pants instead of diapers for their child. Also, keep in mind that during times of stress, children tend to revert back to previous levels of development. You may see you completely toilet-trained child become a "wetter" again. Remember to be patient with him, try to help him through the stressful period and whatever you do, do not make him feel badly about the regressed behaviors- after all, your child is still only being a child.
Anywhere along the process, if you run into any stumbling blocks and are not sure of how best to address them, be sure to discuss the issue with you child’s pediatrician or your family practitioner. You’ll never know what good advice they may have until you ask. - Updated: March 7, 2001
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